just words

i have always longed to live a poetic and graceful existence. yet in retrospect, it all seems so clumsy and haphazard. ideally, all my thoughts and feelings would be neatly packaged, tied up with a bow, ready to be delivered and unwrapped through eloquent speech. perhaps i can blame the media for instilling within me unrealistic expectations of human interaction and expression. in many television programs and films, every action is beautifully executed with a level of composure unmatched in my day to day life. however, i know that in reality there are still individuals who are just, undoubtedly, graceful. while i am often envious of such characters, i have to admit that i rather like the hodgepodge of spontaneous expressions, gestures, words, sounds, and actions of human beings. it is quite the spectacle. i have found though, that it is easiest for me to express myself through the written word. the keyboard, the pen, they all produce a set of recognizable, easy to manage pieces, void of unnecessary interjections or awkward pauses.